what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Randomize
