Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I need moral support for this bender
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
