Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
