Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
My dick has a subreddit
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize
