as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize
