Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
