Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
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He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
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Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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