Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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