Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
