Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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