I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
