am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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