Cold hands, warm shart.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize