So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Randomize