butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
She's the barista slut.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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