I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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