You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Of course I have a pirate flag
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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