happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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