Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
