you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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