I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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