hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Randomize
