Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
