is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
