I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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