the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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