I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize