You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay