But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
so that wasnt chicken after all
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
