You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
