STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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