I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
