In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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