her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize