I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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