Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
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