You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
