i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
God, you're like boner-b-gone
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Randomize
