New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize