He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
