Have you finally orgasmed yet?
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize