I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
