um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
