i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
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