Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Randomize
