im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Randomize
