You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize