your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
