I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
