So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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