you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
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